Whenever I go and stay with my parents, I always find Betsy on my bed. Betsy is a toy rabbit I was given on the day I was born – though by whom I have forgotten – and who, thirty years on, remains just about in one piece. Her little pink dress is long gone,… Continue reading In defence of clutter
Category: life and whatnot
A skyline, razed
It’s the lack of a future, isn’t it? The way the medium-term future has dissolved, an entire skyline razed. We know what we’ll do tomorrow – stay at home, or go to work if we have to. We have an idea of what we might do next year, When This Is All Over. In two… Continue reading A skyline, razed
In search of the lightning strike
Most first-person pieces on dating end neatly (‘and I quit all the apps one Sunday and met my husband on the Tuesday’, or ‘I have decided to stay single, I now devote my life to rescuing orphaned goats*, and I’ve never been happier’) and frankly, so they should. The general rule of writing is: take… Continue reading In search of the lightning strike
Lines that linger
I love a linguistic earworm. Lines and phrases that aren’t necessarily poetic in themselves, but are delivered in such a way that they ring in your head long after they’ve been uttered, and embed themselves into the folds of your brain for all eternity. Comedy is great for this – in fact, I’d venture that… Continue reading Lines that linger
The myth of “ready”
One of the only cheering pieces of news to have caught my attention in the last month was Natalie Imbruglia’s announcement that she has both signed a new record deal and is having a baby on her own, using IVF and a sperm donor. (It is barely three weeks since Boris Johnson became our… Continue reading The myth of “ready”
One of the guys
I don’t watch Love Island, but round at a friend’s last week, I caught a bit of it and frankly, it just caused me considerable distress. I’m perfectly capable of mustering up enough heartbreak in my own life; I have no desire to watch other people being hurt in the name of entertainment. But while… Continue reading One of the guys
Low-maintenance
I have a friend who teaches boys how to kiss. Not as a job, you understand – but if she’s dating a guy and doesn’t like the way he kisses, she will tactfully put him right. I’m not sure of her exact methods (it would be weird if I’d witnessed this, let’s be honest) but… Continue reading Low-maintenance
The greatest adventure
Recently, I’ve stopped looking at men. When I’m pottering round the Lanes at the weekend, on the bus to work, or in the park with the dog, it’s not men that catch my eye. Sure, I can still clock a stylish pair of glasses on a whippet-boned face at twenty paces – like the most… Continue reading The greatest adventure
The necessity of being alone
The second series of the inimitable Derry Girls opens with Erin monologuing in the bath and Orla crashing in with the line, “she’s pretending she’s on Parkinson again!” I cannot tell you how much I love and, as will come as no surprise, relate to that moment. Except when I do it, it’s not Parkinson, it’s Woman’s Hour or… Continue reading The necessity of being alone
The feelings gap
This is essentially a Fleabag fan blog now; deal with it. I think I’ve always been angry. Certainly since adolescence; I threw almighty strops as a teen and my mum used to say, “God, you’re so angry – what’s wrong with you?” Looking back, I see it clearly: I was a shitty teenager, that’s all,… Continue reading The feelings gap
Inbetween Girl 