I know someone who does not kiss on a first date. It’s a shameless and transparent ploy, because he tells the woman at the start of the evening that he doesn’t kiss on a first date, effectively setting up a challenge. I assume he has to play this game to concoct the frisson that other people… Continue reading Boring in bed: on sex, desire & vulnerability
Category: sex
Dragging hidden things into the light
Sometimes in the comments below an online feature about, say, a new crime drama, you see people complain about the amount of sex and violence on TV. “Why can’t they make programmes about something nice? Where the characters are pleasant to each other and no one gets killed?!” moans Gladys from Hampshire, and you find… Continue reading Dragging hidden things into the light
In search of the lightning strike
Most first-person pieces on dating end neatly (‘and I quit all the apps one Sunday and met my husband on the Tuesday’, or ‘I have decided to stay single, I now devote my life to rescuing orphaned goats*, and I’ve never been happier’) and frankly, so they should. The general rule of writing is: take… Continue reading In search of the lightning strike
Lines on lust
The thing about being both insecure and perhaps a touch self-involved is that when someone sends you a 4,000-word email explaining what they think of you, you find it more compelling than creepy. I received one such missive fairly recently, and it contained – among a host of other wildly incorrect things – a line… Continue reading Lines on lust
My favourite t-shirt
My favourite t-shirt is from Alliance For Choice, a not-for-profit organisation that campaigns for abortion rights in Northern Ireland. It’s one of those tops I wear to walk the dog, or to bed, or when I’m working from home. It says #trustwomen on it, and almost every time I catch sight of the lettering, I… Continue reading My favourite t-shirt
29 things
I turn 29 at the end of this week, and are you even a writer on the internet if you don’t publish a list post around your birthday? Here are 29 things I’m fairly certain I know for sure. But ask me again in half an hour a year’s time… 7 things I know about life… Continue reading 29 things
Flirting with writers
Or: Woman, 28, in ‘modern dating is awful’ shock If you’ve read Dolly Alderton’s beautiful memoir Everything I Know About Love, you’ll join me in a sharp intake of breath when I mention the ‘guru chapter’. For the uninitiated: a few years ago, Alderton conducted a phone interview with a man who billed himself as… Continue reading Flirting with writers
Tumblr-ing down
A few weeks ago, Labour MP Jess Phillips commented that one of the ways sex education could be improved is by discussing female pleasure. “We should be telling girls about orgasms during sex education,” she said in an interview with Grazia. “I’m not suggesting we teach children how to masturbate, I’m suggesting we talk to them… Continue reading Tumblr-ing down
Inbetween Girl 